Crystal Hoarder? Break Your Crazy, Cracked-Out Addiction To Crystals
crystal hoarder
It starts with one pretty tumbled crystal you picked up on vacation. Next, you google about your brand new crystal. Then you realize that you need another crystal for that thing you already looked up on WebMD that had you convinced you'd be dead by summer.
247 crystals later, it turns out you're a crystal hoarder.
With no cure in sight.
While our first inclination to cure this crystal addiction is to look for a Crystal Sugar Daddy, all we attract is a partner that tells you that there are rocks in the driveway. 😒
But that's okay; there's a crystal for that.
And therein is where the problem lies.
One crystal was a gateway drug. The next crystal was just an experiment to see if the first crystal had any magical powers. The next thing you know, you're Googling everything and anything about crystals, where the nearest crystal shop is and joining a handful of healing crystals on Facebook only to find you've just joined a crystal gang.
And lest you think that you're curating a super valuable collection that someone would buy from you should you need to make cash fast, think again. Because each crystal you purchased was a personal choice, you can only hope that someone else would fall in love with your crystals, too.
So how do you know that you're a crystal hoarder and not a discerning collector?
You've got so many crystals that you don't even know what all of them are or what they are used for.
When you see a friend struggling, you know the PERFECT crystal that they need in their life to help them.
You watch online gem sales on social media and have "SOLD" already typed out in the comment box to buy the "exclusive, limited, never to be seen or offered again" crystal.
You have chosen who your drug crystal dealer is after buying from some unscrupulous people before.
Your credit card has more crystal purchases than day-to-day necessity purchases like food or gas.
You start to hide the boxes of crystals you've ordered from your partner or family because the last thing you want is another eye roll from the people who just don't get it.
You do so much Googling only to find that there is this ONE crystal that you HAVE TO HAVE because it is rare/limited/different color than what you already have.
You already have a crystal that you're looking at buying, but you justify it because the one you have is lost, or you like the quality of this new one you've just found.
You have to get every color of a crystal in its respective family because your teal fluorite needs its siblings... pink fluorite, green fluorite, brown fluorite, golden-yellow fluorite... well you get it.
Just because you already have a clear quartz tumble, it's not enough because you have to have a wand. And a double terminated one. And a Devic Temple one. And a Window one. And a Dow one. Girl, there's just so many that you need.
You start a Pinterest board of what your new crystal healing room will look like in your home complete with the perfect home altar set up and apothecary looking built-ins.
You've got more than one chakra set of crystals because the first set you bought is seen everywhere and because you're now a crystal hoarder, you wouldn't be caught dead using that set.
Your collection has spilled all over the house. They're in corners, doorways, window sills, on your bathroom sink, in your money corner of your home, in the laundry room after they fell out of your pocket, on the floor of your closet because they fell out of your bra, in your car, in your purse, on your bookshelf and anywhere else you've got a flat surface.
When you go on vacation, you also look for the nearest crystal shop, and you will visit it even if all of the reviews say the store sucks because you never know what you might find.
You've amended your will to let your loved ones know that under no uncertain circumstances that your collection is not to go to the thrift store, and you finally reveal how much you really paid for them.
You've started looking on Amazon for the best boxes to organize your crystals, because dammit you're going to get your shit together.
You've invested in an app to help you document your crystals so you'll never rebuy something that you already have.
You still buy crystals that you already have in inventory... but THIS one is gemmy, clearer, and such a good deal!
You buy a crystal that you notice someone else is drooling over and buy it because if they want it, you know it has to be epic.
You start to buy crystals for your friends at Christmas time to add to their gifts.
If You're A Crystal Hoarder And You Know It, Raise Your Hand
If you've come to grips with the fact that you're a hoarder, not all is lost. I mean, come on... look at all of those beautiful crystals you've got around you. Your home is a good vibe mecca, and you wouldn't want it any other way. Frankly, you can't imagine life before your addiction.
However, it's time to get serious about your *ahem* curated collection. While I will be the first to admit that I unintentionally became a crystal hoarder, one day, I realized that shit was getting out of control.
I had too many crystals, that once I got over the excitement of the purchase, I had forgotten what they were once they started piling up. Was this rhodonite or rhodochrosite? ACK!! Back to the crystal shop, I'd go to have the shop owner help me identify what I actually had (and, of course, pick up a new crystal while I was there, of course).
Then one day, you have a moment of clarity and decide that next month you're not going to buy one more crystal. That's it, no more. Only to see a damn ad in the sidebar for a crystal shop you had forgotten about, and to Relapse City you go.
There's Hope, Crystal Hoarder!
If you can't possibly remember the time before you became the town crystal hoarder wearing more gems than someone from the Royall family on their wedding day, think about this.
It's not really about the crystals, because if I had to guess that you, like so many of us, you were looking for an easy button solution. Grab a citrine and watch the dollar bills wash over you like a tsunami.
Except that didn't happen because the one thing you must remember when you're looking for something to 'rescue' you from whatever situation you're in... that no one is coming to rescue you because you're the only one who can do that for yourself.
This is not to say that healing crystals don't work or that just because you have an extensive collection, you're a fool. You're not. It's about being intentional from this day forward.
I don't think it's possible to be a casual crystal lover when the bug bites you. I think when any of us got that call to explore crystals, it was our intuition telling us there's something more that we need to explore.
Tips For Reclaiming Your Cracked-Out Addiction + Become A Bonafide Force of Crystal Goodness
Take time to work with your crystals. If you'd like to imagine that all of your crystals are your friends, you wouldn't just put them in the corner and ignore them for the rest of the time. You'd hang out with them and get to know more about them.
Challenge yourself, every week, to work with one of your crystal friends. Set 15 minutes aside, every day, and quietly hang out with your crystal. You may then even want to journal about your experience afterward.
Organize your crystals. I bet you've got crystals that you can't even remember bringing home, so now is the perfect time to bring all of your pretties. Plan yourself a crystal party by first figuring out how you're going to organize your crystals so you'll be able to enjoy them easily in the future. Take pictures of them, document the crystal meanings, and find a place of honor in your home.
Research your crystals. If you don't want to spend a Saturday night hosting a crystal party for you and your gemmy friends, then every day, commit to research three of your crystals. See if you can find a theme behind their crystal meanings to help you see if you still need them.
Gift or donate crystals. If you'd like, maybe you'd gift crystals that you think someone else could find helpful knowing that you weren't a lousy crystal parent, but there for a season on the crystals journey to its lifetime caregiver.
Get prehnite. Not to suggest that you get another crystal to add to your collection... but Prehnite could be called the Patron Saint of Crystal Hoarders, helping you to declutter.
Have a plan, Stan. Before you buy your next crystal, do your research. Why do you want this crystal, and what is your plan to work with your new crystal tool once it makes its way to your home.
Make a budget. A budget is totally a downer, but it will calm your crystal collecting ways. Take the time to research the market values for the next crystal you want because believe or not that one crystal that you think is the most amazing value in the world may not actually be such a great value.
Contact the shop or seller. If you're looking at a crystal online, that is a one and only, ask the seller to take more photos of the crystal in the sunlight and without filters. Sometimes those fantastic listing photos online have been photoshopped, which will lead you to be super disappointed if your new baby looks nothing like it's listing pic.
Stop buying sight unseen. You've seen the photos online where there's a pile of one mineral. When you read the details, you find out that you'll get one similar to those in the photo, meaning: you get what you get. If you're totally okay with that, great, but if you're like me, you'll find that you're somewhat disappointed by the crystal that they sent to you.
Did this hit a nerve? Are you feeling the itch to clean up your collection, or are you just getting started? Do you have any crystals to let go of? Let me know in the comments below.